she wonders

She struggles with the feeling
that
everything has
passed her by, or, as she might say:
bypassed her. Or bypast her, as if
everything
good had already
happened. She wonders how many
people
feel this way and if it has
anything to
do with her
age, which isn’t so aged, yet not
so new, either. She tells herself that
the journey is still
young, but she knows she’s not
being so truthful, or at least as
honest as she could be with
herself. It’s a wrestling match she
faces often, a grappling that
leaves her
emotionally and sometimes
spiritually spent. And sometimes she does
wonder
if it might just be better off
ended – quietly,
peaceably,
peace-fully. She
does wonder that.
Did.
Has.
Does.